Published in The Haven·PinnedMember-onlyThe Five Stages Of Bar/Bat Mitzvah GriefOr What To Expect When You’re Expecting…A Bar Mitzvah. — I love my son. He’s a great kid, but he has some of the same challenges as every kid who has ADHD and Autism Spectrum Disorder. …Humor5 min readHumor5 min read
Published in The Haven·PinnedMember-onlyMy Seattle Friends Don’t Believe I’m From Florida“You Don’t Look Like A Florida Man,” They Say. Okay, let’s get it out of the way. I never planned on being a Florida man. I was just born there because my parents decided it would be better to live in the Sunshine State rather than the Keystone State. (After all, what the heck is a keystone, anyway?). So…Humor3 min readHumor3 min read
Published in The Haven·2 days agoMember-onlyHow To Embarrass Your Children For Fun And ProfitHow To Chagrin and Bear It As many smart parents know, embarrassment can be a powerful tool for good or evil. It’s up for us to decide how to harness it. My family is a perfect example. Since I’m middle-aged and not all that proud any more, it’s not so easy to embarrass me. Don’t get…Embarrassing Parents5 min readEmbarrassing Parents5 min read
Published in The Haven·5 days agoMember-onlyTop Books Banned In FloridaAnd Why They’re So Damn Dangerous. There’s a reason people have taken to calling the sunshine state “Flori-duh” and it’s not just because its leaders are so stupid and it’s the home of so many so-called Florida Men. It’s also because the state’s leaders are working hard to make its young citizens dumber than those of…Flori Duh4 min readFlori Duh4 min read
Published in The Haven·Feb 1Member-onlyWhy I’m Still Wearing A MaskAnd It’s Not Why You Might Think I hate wearing these stupid masks with the white hot passion of 10,000 suns. I can’t breathe. I hate smelling my own breath. Worst of all, I hate how the area under the mask always seems to be damp, as thought I were in some sort of sauna for the…Masks3 min readMasks3 min read
Published in The Haven·Jan 31Member-onlyTop Classified Docs Found In My HomeAnd So The Shredding Begins. Whirrrrr. Grrrind. Slice, slice, slice Those are the sounds that are ringing out from my home these days and not just because I’ve finally gotten to the portion of my office cleaning where I’m getting rid of old bank statements. No, I’m shredding as fast as I can because of…Classified Documents3 min readClassified Documents3 min read
Published in The Haven·Jan 27Member-onlySantos Says Trump Killed HimJust When You Thought It Couldn’t Get Any Weirder… The strange saga of New York Congressman George Santos (R — Madeshitup, NY) took an even stranger twist today when the freshman legislator claimed that he became the victim of one of former (P)resident Donald Trump’s craziest political predictions ever. “Many of you will recall that Donald J. Trump once…George Santos3 min readGeorge Santos3 min read
Published in The Haven·Jan 25Member-onlyEven One Hit Wonders Deserve A BreakBecause There’s More To Life Than Meets The Eye I’ve been thinking about One Hit Wonders lately. You know, those bands and singers who splash on the scene with one monster hit that dominates the charts for weeks and weeks and then promptly vanish and are never heard from again. The Safety Dancing Men Without Hats. The Dog Losing…One Hit Wonders5 min readOne Hit Wonders5 min read
Published in The Haven·Jan 23Member-onlyTop Ways The New Congress Will Improve Our LivesIn Case You Weren’t Paying Attention. I admit it. I hate writing anything that puts Republicons in a positive light because they do so few positive things, but I’ve got to take my hat off to them, they haven’t dithered, delayed or let something like the law or the U.S. Constitution keep them from taking decisive…Republican Congress4 min readRepublican Congress4 min read
Published in The Haven·Jan 19Member-onlyAnd Just Like That….Petey Was GoneOr Maybe He Never Really Left. Petey could feel the life force leaving him. After patrolling the neighborhood day and night non-stop since Halloween waiting for something to happen, he was tired. (If anyone who’s dead can ever really be said to be tired.) …Humor4 min readHumor4 min read
